Dylan Southern’s The Thing With Feathers is the tale of a father with two young sons who’d recently lost his wife. Navigating death, grief, and despair was quite the challenge for Dad, especially after an uninvited, intrusive guest shows up at his doorstep. The film is an adaptation of “Grief is the Thing With Feathers” (inspired by Emily Dickinson’s ‘Hope is the Thing With Feathers’). Unlike the novel, the dad here is an illustrator working on his next comic/graphic novel. Dad was overwhelmed by the absence of the love of his life. Every little thing reminded him of her, and sticking to a routine had become harrowingly difficult. The boys needed him, and he tried to show up for them, but he failed, often. He did his best to hide his pain in front of his children, but it was an impossible challenge. He didn’t think he could go through life without her, and every day he wished he’d died instead of her. He feared that he wasn’t a good father, and the thought haunted him every other minute.
Spoiler Alert
What Did The Crow Signify?
The Thing With Feathers attempts to present grief through a horror lens, so when Crow appears, it’s meant to terrify the protagonist and the audience. Dad was working on a project, and clearly the crow was a recurring motif. It was almost as if he couldn’t stop himself from repeatedly drawing the image of the crow. We gradually discover that he was working on a character titled ‘the crow man,’ and somehow the terrifyingly dark imagery had an impact on his sons. His younger son started having nightmares, and his older son had become more mischievous. The lack of a routine, the absence of the mother figure, and the constant sadness and hint of anger that they could see in Dad’s eyes had affected them deeply. They wanted to go back to the way they were, but without Mum, that was impossible. They wanted her back, but they couldn’t have her. They wanted their father to go back to the way he used to be—fun, happy, and enthusiastic—but without their mum, they’d lost everything that they once loved about their father. Meanwhile, Dad was completely wrapped up in his thoughts. He felt as if he was being constantly followed by a giant crow. The bird was extremely critical of Dad and routinely provoked him. Crow signifies grief and the void left by the loss of a loved one. Crow provoked Dad because he wanted him to rage, to cry, and to express his emotions out loud. Dad tried to fight it off, because living with grief, or rather accepting it as a constant companion, was discomforting and agonizing. The more Dad tried to fight it off, the more aggressive and provocative it became. Dad didn’t know how to make space for this uninvited guest in his life. Someone he couldn’t really speak about, yet their haunting presence had turned his life upside down. He didn’t think he was fit to look after his sons—they were struggling and had developed behavioral issues due to the uncertain environment in their house. They too had started to see Crow; grief had caught up with them. The haunting realization—that their mother won’t ever return, that they had possibly permanently lost a side of their father they deeply loved, and that the little details that they remembered of their mother would soon fade away—had finally settled.
Why did Dad try to fight the crow?
Dad felt so consumed by grief that he begged Crow to leave, and it did. But that just made everything worse. If one chooses not to accept grief, they are left with suicidal thoughts, and the same was true for Dad. Death came knocking at his doorstep, but he refused to open the door once, twice, but the third time when he heard his wife’s voice, he couldn’t resist turning the knob. He knew it wasn’t her, he knew it was all in his head, yet the opportunity to catch a fleeting glance of the woman he so deeply loved made him take the plunge. Death tried to get hold of him. It punched Dad, attempting to feast on his aching heart, and only then did Dad beg Crow to return.
Did Dad and his sons accept the intrusive guest?
There is neither any escape from grief nor any shortcut; the only way forward is through, and Dad ultimately accepts it. Instead of shooing away Crow, Dad learned to live with its presence. The provocations perhaps no longer affected him, because he had learned to come to terms with the person he’d become, and only then did he realize how important it was for him to actively try and fix his life. He had to for the sake of his sons, who were lost without a reliable parental figure. Although the boys were young, they understood the difficult time that their father was going through. They didn’t like how he screamed at them or behaved rudely with them, but one day, when he broke down in front of them, they embraced him. Their warmth reminded him of his wife, and he realized that taking care of his sons was the only way for him to feel closer to her.
In The Thing With Feathers, we are told that the first time Dad crossed paths with the giant crow, he had taken the boys to a park because his wife was sick. It was at that moment he realized he wasn’t truly a ‘good father’ because he found it difficult to handle his sons on his own. He experienced momentarily the crippling fear, the self-loathing thoughts, and the taunting remarks; perhaps he had also felt a sense of grief for not being the father he’d always hoped to become. Crow knew his deepest, darkest secrets, and time had taught Dad that grief wasn’t meant to be feared but to be embraced. One couldn’t just move on from loss suddenly on one bright sunny morning; they eventually have to come to terms with the fact that there isn’t really any moving on. It’s all about navigating life, the good and bad days, and ultimately finding a way to live with the constant pain of knowing that the one you’ve lost, you’ve lost forever. For Dad and the boys, it was just that. It wasn’t as if life just became easier one fine day; they simply learned to live with the knowledge that their mother/wife was gone. Crow used its large wings to embrace Dad and his boys. Dad finally gathered the strength to pack his wife’s belongings; it wasn’t easy, but he knew it was necessary. Crow had transformed into a babysitter, a therapist, and somewhat of a friend. And instead of being bothered by Crow’s presence, Dad found the bird inspirational. After eighteen long months, Dad finally finished his comic book with Crow as the central character.
What does the final scene suggest?
On the day of his book launch, Dad’s loved ones showed up for him. When he was asked to give a speech, Dad was a little puzzled, and even in a room full of people, for a second he imagined Crow standing right in front of him. He could either give in to his self-deprecating thoughts, or he could push them aside and be present in the moment. Crow’s presence wasn’t distracting, isolating, or overwhelming anymore; Crow was simply a reminder of the darkest days of his life. Dad continued with his speech; he thanked his boys and his loved ones. Without their support and their faith in him, he perhaps wouldn’t have managed to navigate his emotions.
After pouring his feelings and imaginations onto the paper, Dad finally accepted he had put a structure to all that he was internally going through, and it was time to finally attempt to take a step forward. He cleared his desk and dumped all the scribbles and sketches of Crow into a cardboard box. At night when a crow, a normal-sized one, entered his room and sat on his chest and cawed, he wasn’t afraid; he continued to sleep comfortably. In the final scene, Dad and the boys went to a sea beach. Dad pulled out an urn, and although he knew his wife wouldn’t have approved of him reciting R. S. Thomas’ ‘Comparisons,’ he did it anyway. In the poem, the poet wrote about how he had often compared his wife to fragile, fleeting objects like a snowflake or a feather, but unlike the objects that eventually melted or were blown away, the ashes of his wife stayed with him like an anchor. Dad recited the poem as a reminder to himself that releasing her ashes didn’t immediately signify that he was letting go of her. She would forever stay with him. Dad finally released her ashes, and they immediately became one with nature. After hearing their father repeatedly say ‘I love you’ (to his wife), the boys rushed in his direction and embraced him tightly; they wanted him to know that they loved him too. The boys had realized that sometimes their father needed affection and support, and they were there to comfort him.
The Thing With Feathers’ ending suggests that Dad and his boys were ready for the next chapter in their lives, which doesn’t mean that they would magically stop thinking about their wife/mother. They simply have learned to live with the truth and with the grief, and time will only help them navigate through these feelings more effectively.
